Sad news. had a follow up today and yesterday and the treatment didn’t work. The tumor is growing and Sam was exited from the study. Not only that, but to add to it, Sam jumped from the back of the van… About 1 hour away from Columbia and fractured the bone. Since it’s a long weekend and his platelets are low, we were sent home to think. About amputation again. He can’t have the surgery yet…. From the radiation.
My heart breaks and is full of regrets. If I could turn back time, I’d have spent the money and removed that GD leg in April. I was just so hopeful that maybe the chemo/radiation could keep the OSA under control. Shows what I know.
Until next week, I’m going to hold Sammy close and try to keep him from breaking his leg more. The sound… That came out of him…the wail? I hope I never hear that again. 🙁
I read a post of a dog with a bucket list. Over the next week, Sam will be creating and fulfilling his own bucket list. Anyone have any great bucket list ideas for us?
Gosh! I am just now catchingup on all your blogs! WOW! What a crazy roller coaster ride you and Sam have been on!!
Now, as a “seasoned roller coaster rider” here, let’s take a deep breath, knock all the wasted energy over regrets to the curb, and move forward with a plan to restore Sam’s quality and make hu dreds of vuckets for him to carry all his wishes!!!
B R E A T H E……DEEP BREATHS IN….EXHALE SLOWLY…..B R E A T H E……
Keep chocolate in your pockets at all times…devour as needed!
Now, this is by no means the end for Sam! That boy has a lot of spunk and determination…as evidenced him trying to pole vault in the van!! Yes, this is going to be a long week-end. I assume the vet gave you plenty of pain meds, etc. It sounds like, once all the radiation, blood count, etc. stuff gets straight, Sam will be an excellent candidate for amputation.
You made a decision to proceed as you did with the advice of professionals! There was no reason not to give it a shot! Had you ust proceeded straight with the amputation, you would have always second guessed…”what if you had tried the radiation and it worked”….
This piece of crap disease tries to get to is anyway it can. It tries to make us second guess everything! It tries to keep s from being in the present with our pups and from enjoying our sacred treasured time together…months…years….no one knows!!!
What you do know, is you have NOW with Sam!! And you will NOT let that f’n crap disease interfere with you amd Sam!! You’ve been n the site long enough to kow we all try to live like our dogs! Live like Sam! He’s not worried about a thing!!! He’s living in the moment…doesn’t care about statistics, regret, prognosis-schmognosis…he just wants to soak up all the loving and spoilig that’s coming his way!!
When you can proceed with amputation amd once recovery is complete, he will be pain free!! No more surgeries, no more pain!! QUALITY !!
Now, a couple of ideas for Sam’s bucket list! I wish I knew how to do “links”…I have a video of Happy Hannah pulling tings out of her “bucket”.
First thing I bet Sam would put in there would be a magic wand to erase the word “regret” from your existence!!
Then, he would put in a smal bowl where he could have a scoop of ice cream a day!
Happy Hannah put some M&Ms in her bucket and she could have a couple a day!
Deer poop…does Sam like deer poop??
How bout a voucher for three five tummy rubs a day? Bet he would love that!!
Butt scratches and ear scratches! Maybe a voucher for a couple of those a day!
A five minute “leash free” walk! Swimming in a lake!
Steak at least three times a week!
Must a couple of things Sam may want in his bucket! But most of all, Sam wants you fully present with him creating more blissful fun memories so ful of love they will last an eternity!!
Oh, and this probably isn’t in his bucket, but put it in yours..loads and loads of pictures.-.and be sure and include some with you in them! Take poctures of some of his everyday habits…how he likes to sleep..how he barks if so ene comes to the door…and how much he enjoys his ice cream and steak!
Please know we are all here for you! You are not alone! PM me and I’ll be glad to give you my phone number…I mean it, okay?
You jave a lot of shopping to do for Sam’s bucket list…breathing exercises and chocolate to eat! Don’t exhaust yourself!!
Sending love and hugs to all!
Sally and Happy Hannah
I am so very sorry to hear about the break. My girl, Shelby, broke her leg in a simliar manner and while she didn’t have OSA, we chose to fix her leg first. Then 4 months later, her cancer appeared in her spleen and three months after that, her leg was finally removed. during her chemo. So it can be done. I beat myself up for months (and still do) about if I had taken the leg when it first broke would I have found the cancer earlier? Maybe or maybe not. I finally had to make peace with myself and Shelby’s memory in that Shelby knew that I always did everything for her. And you are doing everything for Sam! We can all see that.
Sending you so much love in this very painful time in your journey together. As far as a bucket list, that’s a great idea! Shelby’s would have included lots of snuggles, lots of naughty foods, like Sally listed, toys, time outside with the beach breeze in her fur… I know that sound. Over a year later, I still hear her scream. It was awful.
And while Shelby has crossed the bridge, I do know that her last months on this earth were just as amazing as all her healthy ones. I know you are amazing parent!!!
Hugs and love!
Alison & her Shelby fur-ever in her heart
I’m so sorry to hear that things have not gone as hoped for with Sam. Cancer SUCKS!!! As Sally said you do not need to question the choice you made for your beloved Sam (easier said than done I know). You did what you thought was best in hopes that Sam would keep all 4 legs. For whatever reason things did not go as planned but know that you still have an option to save Sam and keep him with you.
I had run out of options for my dear Leland and had to put him to sleep this past Monday.
Trust that you are a good mom to Sam and that you will make the best decisions for him.
Sending positive thoughts your and Sam’s way!
Sahana & Angel Leland
Oh guys I’m so sorry to hear this. How is he doing today? My heart aches for you, I know that you are a great pawrent who is doing all you can do. Try not to have regrets, we all do the best we can with the information we have at the time.
How is his pain? What meds is he on? I’m confused, why isn’t amputation an option right now?
Whatever you decide I know it will be made with love and his best interests in mind. If you need to talk, we are here for you and will support you.
Lotsa hugs coming your way.